Yesterday, I took some time to read back through the whole series as a single body of work. It was… interesting.
On the whole, I accomplished what I set out to do. But…
… Somewhere along the way I lost the enthusiastic tone I had when I started out.
Obviously, at some point writing about Joy every single day became a bit of a struggle. It’s not that I ran out of things to say. I all honesty, I still have ideas for a dozen or so more posts. I still have a few in draft form that never saw the light of day.
I just got tired of seeing the word JOY on my screen.
… Some of it isn’t my very best writing.
There were days I just didn’t have a post ready and life happened. Instead having a scheduled post ready at 7am, I was still laboring with WHAT to write at 10am.
I had plenty of ideas. But I struggled with the pace. Do I put multiple serious things in a row? Just how many silly posts can I share before it loses meaning?
I had plenty of ideas, but sometimes what I wrote wasn’t authentic.
Or sometimes it was too authentic. Too raw. Too gut wrenching as I attempted to write it.
… Life happened.
I hadn’t planned on the time consuming process of buying a new car.
I had forgotten how disruptive soccer season becomes.
I had no idea how disruptive hunting season can be. (last night, he was cleaning guns in bed. ugh!)
And honestly, I think some extra stuff came up just because I was trying to write this series.
I’d also forgotten how challenging it is to post twice a day. Sundays became really challenging because I was trying to get out a thankful thought, a post on joy, AND write a newsletter. On Sunday.
… Writing became a chore.
For the first time since I started this blog, I seriously struggled to face the keyboard.
So much so that I’ve begun to ignore twitter and Facebook. I’ve ignored other blogs. Not because I don’t want to be around you ladies but because I just didn’t want to look at a keyboard with the letters J-O-Y on it.
I know I’m blessed. Most of the time (today included) I sit down to write with half the words already formed in my head. I put my fingers on the keyboard and the words just flow out in the order they belong. I’m the student in college who could sit down and whip out a 15 page research paper in two hours when I finally got around to it because I’d been writing it my head while we played pool.
When that doesn’t happen, my first instinct is to just go play until the words happen.
When I can’t do that, I force the words and hate the process.
But honestly, pushing through that struggle until the words flowed again was good for me. I learned some new tools. I grew. I’m more confident in my ability to write on a sustained basis because of this month.
(I have half a dozen e-books that I’ve started over the past few years. All of them are about one third done. I could probably finish them now if I wanted to. Hmmm…)
I like what I wrote, but I’m surprised…
… there were a few posts I hesitated to share but you loved.
It never ceases to amaze me to see how people respond to my writing. Sometimes I’ll writing something that I thought was hysterically funny that gets not one comment or share. And then I’ll toss out something silly (like the car line rules) that lights up everyone’s day.
If I ever can figure out how you (the reader) will respond, I’ll be dangerous.
… there were some posts I hadn’t planned on.
At the start of the month, I had a long list of ideas for posts (almost 50 of them). I had a calendar where I slotted in posts to keep the pace varied and interesting. (So no back-to-back list days, alternate between short and long posts, etc). I’m not sure why I bothered.
Sometimes I started writing on a post and realized it deserved multiple days. Alternately, I’d start writing and say everything I had to say in a few paragraphs.
…the project took on a life of it’s own.
After the first week, I let go of the plan and just wrote what “felt” right.
Sometimes, that worked better than others.
At the end of 31 days of Joy in Motherhood, here’s the score.
I’d do it again, but with more planning and thought beforehand.
I’m glad I did it, and I’m proud of myself for not quitting partway through.
I think at least something I wrote mattered. Different posts touched each of you differently.
But in the end, I accomplished my goal. I brought more Joy into my own life as a mom. I’d like to think I brought you some joy too.
And I’m really glad I didn’t try to write for 31 days about coffee.
[author] [author_image timthumb=’on’]http://thishappymom.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/DSC_0036.jpg[/author_image] [author_info]Houston Mom Blogger Susan Baker has a passion for encouraging weary worn out mothers to find joy in everyday motherhood. She has two elementary school boys, one engineering husband, and one cat. She has a strange fascination for eggs, socks, and books. She spends far too much time on Social Media and at Target. She is crazy in love with her family. She serves an amazing God. She lives an ordinary life filled with wonder. [/author_info] [/author]