Ten toppings that don’t belong on my pizza

I’m open to experimental pizza toppings.  My kids are stuck on plain cheese (with an occasional nod to “pizza with spots” aka pepperoni) but the adults in my house rarely order the same thing twice.

It helps that our favorite pizza joint down the street has some pretty adventurous pizza of the month specials.  Last night was garden veggie, complete with sliced tomatoes and fresh spinach.

We’ve also made our share of gourmet grilled backyard pizzas.  Yummy!

It was actually hard to come up with ingredients I’d NEVER want on a pizza.  If I thought of something weird (like marshmallows) I could immediately come up with a pizza that would be fabulous (s’mores dessert pizza) with it.  I also wanted to avoid listing stuff I won’t eat under any circumstance – like olives!

10 bad pizza toppings header

For the record, here are 10 toppings that should NEVER be on pizza.

1.  Snails.  Escargot does not belong on pizza. It’s perfectly good left in the vat of garlic buttery goodness.

2.  Candy corn.  Even on a dessert pizza it’s just the wrong texture.

3. Bean sprouts or bamboo shoots. They don’t do well with heat OR cheese.

4. Water chestnuts.  Or Jicima.

5. Tuna.  Does this really need an explanation?

6.  Pickled anything.  Just… no.

7.  Gummy worms.  My kids had no explanation, they just wanted to contribute to the list.

8.  Popcorn.

9.  Caviar.

10.  Sushi (or sashimi).

If you can come up with a pizza combination involving any of these ingredients that sounds tasty, let me know.

I’d also love to know what you don’t ever want to see on YOUR pizza.

10 toppings that dont belong on my pizza

What’s my favorite pizza?

Honestly it’s hard to pick just one.  My default pizza when I’m stressed out is a Hawaiian with bacon and pineapple. But I also love what we lovingly call a P-SMOG (pepperoni, sausage, mushrooms, onions, and green peppers) topped with seasoned salt and dipped in ranch dressing.  My husband likes trash can pizzas – just throw it all in there.

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Susan Baker
I have a passion for encouraging weary worn out mothers to find joy in everyday motherhood and peace in unlikely places. I have two elementary school boys, one nerdy husband, and two cats. I have a strange fascination for bad puns, the color pink, socks, and books. I worry about running out of toilet paper, wine, and chocolate.. I serve an amazing God. I live an ordinary life filled with wonder.
Susan Baker
Susan Baker

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  1. I would never, ever, under any circumstance have fish of any kind on my pizza. But I WILL take all of your olives! Feel free to send them over.
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  2. I also do not want that kind of pizza, it even removes my appetite almost immediately.
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