Pages from My Yelling Journal – The Volume Knob

Since we’re on this journey from anger to peace together, I thought it was only fair to share some of what I’ve written in my yelling journal.  This is all about the volume knob on the television.  It turns out that volume knobs aren’t just for tv.

(Yes, I know, televisions don’t have knobs any longer.  They have buttons.  But you know what I mean.)

This is pretty much a word for word transcription of my  journal entry.  You even get a peek at my really bad handwriting.

the volume knob

I yelled because…

You were upstairs and I wasn’t.  I’m too tired to climb the stairs.

I yelled because…



I’m not even mad.

I just want to be heard.

I’m not even mad.

I am now.

You talked back to me.  You had the nerve to argue with me about the tv volume.

“It’s only at 25.”

And then, I realized you didn’t know.  You didn’t know how TV volume works.  You had no way to know how quirky it is.

I never told you how 25 can be too quiet for one show and too loud for the next.  I never told you how 25 can be loud in one room and louder in a different one. You haven’t noticed that commercials are louder than the show because we rarely watch commercials.

So I told you.

Both of these represent times when I’m yelling but not really angry.  Not yet.  I just need to make myself heard above the noise and the chaos.

turn the volume down

The problem is that most of the time, yelling doesn’t work. No matter how much I yell they don’t hear me.

Both of them end up with me yelling IN ANGER.  Once I start yelling for attention, then the natural progression is to YELL EVEN LOUDER.

I hit 60, started yelling, and just cranked the knob up to 70 and then 80.  

Once I start yelling, I just turn up the volume knob and yell louder.

I’m convinced that yelling louder and louder until I get the results I want is just… foolishness.  There has to be a better way to parent.

Do you know what works better than shouting over the television?

Grabbing the television remote and pushing the pause button.  Or at least turning the volume knob down.

Even better? Teaching my kids to adjust the volume at the start of each show.

You know what works better than bellowing from the kitchen to the child upstairs?  

Walking to the foot of the stairs and calling my son’s name.  If I wait until I have his attention (and he’s standing at the top of the stairs) then I don’t have to shout.

volume control is not just for televisions

 Question for you:

Any suggestions for teaching my kids that the television remote includes volume control?

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Susan Baker
I have a passion for encouraging weary worn out mothers to find joy in everyday motherhood and peace in unlikely places. I have two elementary school boys, one nerdy husband, and two cats. I have a strange fascination for bad puns, the color pink, socks, and books. I worry about running out of toilet paper, wine, and chocolate.. I serve an amazing God. I live an ordinary life filled with wonder.
Susan Baker
Susan Baker

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