And the worst thing was…

When I pick my kids up from car line, they immediately start telling stories.  Invariably, one of them tells a story that includes the phrase “and the worst thing was….” followed by some tale of elementary horror.

They do NOT tell these stories to me.

My boys are only 16 months apart.  One of the best parts of going back to school is that they have time and space enough to miss each other again.  Sibling on sibling violence drops to an all-time low right after school starts.  Every afternoon turns into a best-friend reunion.

When the boys get in the car, they can’t WAIT to talk to each other.  If I try to ask them a question or try to find out more about what they are saying, they both look at me and say “we weren’t talking to YOU mommy.”

Nice.

So I listen.

Over the years, the phrase “and the worst thing was” has been followed by an amazing variety of incidents. Some are trivial.  Some are scary enough out of context that I actually ask the teacher.  Some are down right funny.  I figure it’s about time I shared my favorites with you.

Top 10 “and the worst thing was…” stories.

1.  The day Jimmy showed off his Batman underwear to Sally.

the worst thing that happened all day happened to someone else

2. As a tummy bug was making the rounds, one of the kindergarten teachers told her class that she’d give them a dollar if they could throw up in the trashcan instead of the on the floor.  My son was in AWE that his friend got a dollar for throwing up in the trash can.

3.  The day that my son forgot to wear underwear.

4.  The time one of their friends got the wrong lunch and there was mustard on the sandwich.  It’s hard to explain, but the fake throw up sounds from the back seat were quite amusing.

5.  The day that they had a fire drill and it was hot outside.

6.  The day that Dustin swallowed his tooth.  It’s only funny because my sons started wondering how long it would take to “poop a tooth out” and if you could bite yourself on the hind end.

7.  The time I experimented with a new item in their lunches and both boys thought it was disgusting.  Once again, the fake throw up sounds from the back seat were amusing.

8.  That time my son’s shoe fell apart on the playground.  At least that’s the story I got about why the sole was no longer attached to the rest of the shoe.

9.  The time the pencil broke.  Seriously.  That’s the worst thing that happened all day.  It didn’t even happen to my child.  Some OTHER child having a pencil break in their hand was the worst thing that happened the entire day.

10.  The day one of my boys swallowed gum.  Yes.  They did start wondering how long it takes for gum to pass through the body.  Yes.  They started speculating about blowing bubbles in the process.  Yes.  They did ask for beans for dinner that night.

Hmmm… there seems to be a lot of underwear, pooping, destruction, and throw up (fake and real).  It just comes with raising boys.

Yesterday’s worst thing ever…

It was their first day of school.

GoGo complained that it was too hot at recess.

Watty complained that his water bottle leaked at recess.

Seriously.  That’s all they could find to gripe about from an entire day of school.

What’s the best “worst thing ever” story you’ve heard?

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Susan Baker
I have a passion for encouraging weary worn out mothers to find joy in everyday motherhood and peace in unlikely places. I have two elementary school boys, one nerdy husband, and two cats. I have a strange fascination for bad puns, the color pink, socks, and books. I worry about running out of toilet paper, wine, and chocolate.. I serve an amazing God. I live an ordinary life filled with wonder.
Susan Baker
Susan Baker

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Comments

  1. This is so cute! I homeschool my kids so their conversations are a little different. My kids get together with one of their friends and say “You won’t believe what my mom did today…”
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  2. Love that they can’t wait to tell each other…that totally makes me smile. :)-Ashley
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