Just how many socks are enough?

Do you ever get the feeling you are drowning in laundry?  (You know how I feel about laundry, right?)  My latest obsession is with socks.

Someone in my family is a sock hoarder.  He’s been socking them away for years.

I LOATHE sorting socks – specifically men’s socks.

The other day, I realized my husband’s socks had gotten completely out of control.  I looked at him in all seriousness and asked him “just how many socks are enough for you!?”

For contrast, I have about two dozen pair of socks in total.  I have winter wool socks, work out socks, and dressy black socks.  That’s it.  When my socks outgrow my sock drawer, I throw some away.   I’ve been handling it that way for years and I’ve NEVER run out of socks.

My husband owns…. (drumroll please)  over 60 pairs of socks.

how many socks does he need?Half of them are a light brown color – just one shade off of “laundry grey.”  He doesn’t even own any shoes that look right with the light brown socks.

Visualize a large round laundry basket completely filled with neatly paired and sorted socks.  He has more than that.

To hammer home the craziness of it all, he owns maybe 10 pairs of underwear and 2 pair of jeans.

If there was a major laundry disruption, at least he’d have clean feet.

If there was a sock-pocalypse, he would be covered.

In a sock-tastrophe, he would be the man to turn to.

Since I’m the one who does the laundry, I assumed I had the right to voice an opinion of my husband’s enormous sock collection.  I was wrong.

Me:  Would you consider getting rid of some of your socks?

Hubby: They’re perfectly good socks. I’ll get rid of them when they wear out.

Me:  But you never even WEAR most of them.

Hubby:  Exactly.

With that, he throw a balled up sock at me and left the room.

I guess my biggest complaint is that they aren’t even GOOD socks.  I’ve tried giving him nice socks and he just tucks them away for later… when the cheap ones wear out.

I’ve tried throwing away the mismatched “orphan” socks – he fishes them out of the trashcan.

I speak from experience – there are only so many sock crafts a family can enjoy.  When my hair was long, I ran through a few of his socks making sock buns.  We did sock puppets when the kids were younger.  We don’t need any more heating pads (made from a sock and a bunch of cheap rice).

I’m up to my knees in socks.

(giggle)

When I go put his socks away I have to brace from the sock-a-lanche as they fall.

Quite frankly, I’m out of ideas.

Gentle reader, I need your help.

I need your best creative ideas. Should I purge the sock drawer when he isn’t looking, even though he’s told me not to?  Do I wash most of his socks with my new red sweater?  Do I hide them?  Do I call the Hoarders show? Help!

How do I address this in a way that honors my husband but gets rid of all the excess socks?

Just how many socks are too many?

my husband has too many socks

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Susan Baker
I have a passion for encouraging weary worn out mothers to find joy in everyday motherhood and peace in unlikely places. I have two elementary school boys, one nerdy husband, and two cats. I have a strange fascination for bad puns, the color pink, socks, and books. I worry about running out of toilet paper, wine, and chocolate.. I serve an amazing God. I live an ordinary life filled with wonder.
Susan Baker
Susan Baker

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Comments

  1. too funny, hubby has tons of socks too… I “borrow” them for cleaning and to play tug-of-war with the dog. He never even notices, LOLOLOL
    karen recently posted..WORDLESS WED Dino and His Train TrackMy Profile

  2. {Melinda} Laundry is the bane of my existence. The thing I am most looking forward to NOT doing in heaven. My husband may tie your husband for the record of most socks. I don’t have any answer to the sockspalooza. Perhaps they lost socks as children and are now hoarding them from that trauma. It\’s a mystery. Be strong. You are not alone 🙂
    MotheringFromScratch recently posted..the past is a great place for a family vacationMy Profile

    • I was thinking of you as I wrote this.

      I know I’m not alone… If it wasn’t the socks I’d find some other laundry bane to grouse about. I just have a hard time maintaining a good attitude around the sock-stravaganza.

  3. Everyone in this house has too many socks! And we can never find a match because no one ever matches them up. Its horrible. I have taken to buying all the same sports socks so everyone can wear the same ones. When I do manage to get mine matched up, my daughter steals them anyway. I give up. Laundry is one of my least favorite chores. As if I had a favorite.
    Michelle recently posted..How To Grow Your Blog by Building a Tribe of Online FriendsMy Profile

    • Since I survive the winter in $15/pr smart wool socks, sharing isn’t an option. I guess I should be thankful my kids share socks with each other. In a year or two they’ll be in the same size I am. That should help, right?

  4. Aileen Takahashi says:

    Scissors are the answer for the ones you try to toss in the garbage can and he fishes them out. Cut them lengthwise so they cannot be worn again. I had to do this with the whole holy underwear and t-shirt deal. But, the t-shirt/underwear is still good argument despite the fact that it was tattered to threads and see through. So I looked at my spouse and said, it's not good anymore as I ripped the holy see through shirt into shreds, and exclaimed that it was going to be my new mop for cleaning the floor. The other alternative is to steal them away for polishing the car, putting on shoe polish on shoes, cleaning the light fixtures, or just plain tossing them one at a time to the folks at Goodwill. If the disappearance of his sock is gradual, he won't notice right away.

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